Consequences

Dear child,

Today you are learning your lesson the hard way.

I don’t care if it was an accident or a lightning flash of rebellion or just a critical lack of judgment, there is magic marker on the wall. 

You will scrub the magic marker off the wall.  Yes, until it’s all gone.

Oh, but of COURSE it’s permanent marker!  Why would you use anything else? 

I know that the Magic Eraser will get that off the wall in a jiffy.  And, I am keeping that as my very own little secret while you scrub and rub.  You need to spend a little time on this. 

Time to sweat this out a little.  Time to think mommy’s so mean.  Time to wonder what’s going to happen if you can’t make this marker disappear.  Time to wish you had never done this.  Time to feel a little panicked.  Time to wonder why and be slightly alarmed by the fact that Mom didn’t raise her voice or get angry.  Time to gain some perspective.  And accept responsibility.

Use this time to come to the realization that you will never do this again.  Use this time to cry a little if you need to, that’s OK.  Use this time feel the weight of remorse.  Use this time to understand that actions have consequences. 

Thank you for your apology, sweetheart.  Thank you for the hug and the promise not to do this again.  Thank you for the tears…they confirm to me that you have learned your lesson.  I love you more than anything and, despite what you think, your tears break my heart, always.  This is not something you will realize until you have a child of your own.  This DOES hurt me more than it hurts you, but I’m doing you a grave disservice if I act otherwise.

Here, try this Magic Eraser.  Wow, isn’t that amazing?!!

I love you.  So very, very much. 

Mom